One cannot love another greater than they live themselves. The task at hand is to radically love the self. The world cannot and will not change unless love is brought into its purest and most unconditional essence.
Love has morphed into a means of convenience, boredom, and manipulation. Extending oneself in exchange for something else is not love. It’s bartering, trading and commerce. Needing another to feel whole and complete is not love; it is a version of addiction.
To truly love means not giving yourself away but instead grounding so deeply in your own truth of completeness – not the egos version of the truth – but your innate truth of being whole. Real love extends every word, thought and action, seeing the other as the self, also whole and complete. Sometimes that means sweetness and softness, other times sternness and discipline. But you truly know it’s real love through the tone and motive expressed.
We live in a material world where everything is traded for money, status and power… time, dreams, integrity, love. In this way, we abandon the self, and each other. Is that love? Many are in relationship, but it’s not love; it’s convenience. It’s a trade. ‘You do this for me; I’ll do that for you.’ This creates resentment.
Love does not use, abuse or manipulate. It seeks nothing. It requires nothing. It yearns for nothing because it is full and fulfilled within itself. Seeking love from any ‘other’ is an attempt to fill oneself. The emptiness you feel is where you have given yourself away for something less valuable, only to keep seeking what was lost along the way.
Fall in love with your aloneness. Discover first how to be only with yourself, without the trappings of the world. Each time you yearn for another, give yourself the very thing you seek. When you no longer codependently need someone, they will perfectly appear and be just as whole, loving and complete. That will be true spiritual partnership, where two can come together as one, yet be interdependent beings of individuality.
Solemnly vow to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, till death do you part and as long as you live… YOU. This is the sacred marriage. When you know true love, losing everything or gaining everything is of no consequence. It becomes background music.
In Love…
Simran
