Patterns of Change…Nuances of CHOICE

When you think of yesterday, be grateful for all that you have been. When you think of tomorrow, be grateful for all you have yet to become. When you think of today, STOP thinking about it and just LIVE to the fullest !!!    
Spending so many years in the fashion industry, I saw trends come and trends go, colors were in and then out, lengths went from long to short and back to long. There were many aspects of the fashion industry that I loved: helping people transform, seeing amazing apparel, putting together combinations and pushing the limits of style. However, my favorite part was textiles. It was fabric that inspired me: the texture, color, feel, and dimension. My mind would start racing at the endless combinations that could result from combining different materials. My creativity would soar. I always went beyond the normal limits of an ensemble when combining prints, colors and textures. It was the creativity that would be unleashed that sent my spirit soaring. All of a sudden I was no longer there. I became the organic process of creation for that period of time.      There was always another aspect as well, one that I was not aware of for a very long time. I had always been extremely quick thinking and an incredible multi-tasker. In the beginning, it was who I was being it became what I was doing. In being quick, creative and multi-faceted, there was a fuel of passion that inspired me. One could say I was ‘In Spirit’ or that Spirit was breathing through me that hand of creativity.   
Market representatives were always astounded at how I could take a 200 piece line and whittle it down into an amazing collection in a matter of minutes. For most buyers, the same task would take several hours. However, at the time, I did not even realize that this was something unique, I simply was in joy at being able to create. As time passed, success meant more had to get done.  My special ability to move quickly, be decisive, and have an eye for beauty became a tool that I used as time seemed less and less available. I was having an incredible time in the process because I was utilizing all my senses and creativity in that glamorous world; however as I was losing myself in the process, I was also losing time for everything to fit in.     
I very much remember getting into the fashion industry at age 8, going to the markets with my parents and watching them buy garments for a high end women’s apparel boutique. It was the seventies and many of the styles had influences of Indian fabrics, layering of various lengths, and colors that are all back once again wheels within wheels; cycles upon cycles. In fact this is the fourth time since the seventies that those trends are being seen, each subsequent time in a slightly new way.      But, isn’t that how patterns change slowly and subtly? I found, for me at least, it was that way in fashion and in the soul journey. What is that statement ‘As much as things change, they stay the same.’     
Fashion also taught me that it was not so much the trend that was important, nor the color. True fashionistas were so because of the ‘details’. The woman who was truly defined as ‘fashion’ usually had a signature, a detail a special choosing of items that set her apart from the rest. In fashion, the uniqueness of one individual from another rested in the nuances that came from specific choices. However, it was very apparent that changing style, particularly color was a series of small baby steps for most.      The soul journey is not much different. The patterns of ‘what we do’ and ‘how we do’ become our cloak of the day. We wear it well as long as it seems to fit or until it feels old or too small. In that moment, we either slip deeper into a pattern or choose to do something differently. If we slip deeper into a pattern, we experience tiredness, boredom, depression or anxiety. If we step into a choice, we will experience ourselves in a new way.     
At first, the choice may seem like a giant leap from where we had been. When further down the path, we more clearly see that we were possibly doing the same thing just in a slightly different way. We have moved but may not have moved as much as we thought and that is the beauty of the journey because we are in an endless state of self-discovery.  The choice, the change was actually in the nuances. In reality, the nuances were the real milestones to be honored. Some call them ‘the small steps along the path.’ In an assessment of the nuances we truly see the giant leaps we have taken.     
As I approached my third decade in the fashion industry, I realized that the repeating cycles of fashion were only serving to let me experience repeating cycles of myself. However there was one large difference, my quick mindedness and multitasking ability was no longer part of my being, they had really become my doing. I realized fabric no longer excited me in the way that it once had. I had experienced cycles of fashion so many times that nothing seemed new. Creating was not as invigorating; I was no longer experiencing myself or my senses. In fact, I no longer experienced much of anything. They were no longer outlets for my creative side. Somewhere along the way, it had gone dormant I let the work become more important than the enjoyment it originally brought.     
The color that had once filled life through this glorious thing called fashion had faded away. I now looked through the gray film of a human machine. I was an endless series of lists and tasks, obligations and responsibilities to everyone and everything but me. I was so caught in my patterns of work, that work became who I was. Without it, nothing would have been left of me However for some people, luckily for me, I came to a wonderful realization I had become the walking dead. I would imagine it is an experience that many have at some point. Some acknowledge it, others deny it, many overcome it, and some live with it in fear that nothing better could be out there. However, it is an incredible gift, because that is the very point where surrender comes. That is the moment when the hands get thrown up in the air, a person falls to their knees, the damn of tears finally breaks, and the words finally come out that need to be spoken (if to no one else but oneself).    
So what happens when one dies to their old self, they resurrect, find rebirth isn’t that part of what Christ was trying to show us; what nature illustrates year after year, what many other sacred philosophies also speak of. That is the beauty of the human experience, we do get an infinite number of ‘do-overs’. Cats do not have to be the only ones with nine lives. How many times has Madonna reinvented herself? It is what fashion is based on. We are surrounded by reflections of this constantly.     
Step by step, we all learn to turn back toward ourselves, There begins a desire to discover what lay within, how expansive it is and what is going to re-ignite that fire within the core? As I now stand back and witness what many would call giant leaps in the past two years in creating the Believe Center, 11:11 magazine and now the C.H.O.I.C.E. Alliance, I am so very grateful. I have such gratitude for who I had to be for this to unfold. I embrace every moment of pain or numbness that was part of my beautiful fabric. I am so grateful for the ALL of me yet to be discovered but most of all I am grateful that I live fully and completely in every single moment.      
I boldly share these amazing steps of manifestation so that you may see what is resting as possibility within YOU. What I have done is only special in that “I have allowed myself to be free to fully experience the unknown parts of ME.” You have unknown parts waiting to be discovered waiting to be energized with the adrenaline of not knowing how, yet excitedly being driven to create something that is an extension of YOU. We are all here to create we are here to simply experience the vastness and greatness of who we can be and that is so much more than we can ever fathom. We are here to find that place of total surrender where living without bold expression is to claim the life of the walking dead. It is a choice: continue an old pattern or discover your nuances toward change.I have to chuckle. I do honor what has come through me and how I have enjoyed myself every step of the way but in the grand scheme of things, I humbly submit these creations were not my giant leaps. My giant leaps have been in the slight nuances of choice. Through different parts of the two years of this rebirth, I have found myself reflecting “Have I really changed? Am I doing something different or really just doing the same thing with a different twist?”     
Then I laugh with myself, stand tall and feel proud. Although I still have work-a-holic tendencies the nuance is that I am able to see how I am letting go of that side level by level. I pamper myself in ways that I never did before. I take time to stop. I am dedicated to a new passion that energizes me and I do it first and foremost for ME. The nuance is that I have taken the small steps to drink more water, eat three meals a day instead of one and go to bed when I am tired. I am learning to play so that ‘this’ play does not become work. The nuance is that the woman I used to be thought she had to do everything by herself and now I have surrounded myself with wonderful associates that let me delegate tasks. These are my giant leaps for someone else these may seem easy. However, we each have our own mountain. I am proud to share my journey because I would not be able to inspire others without having had the experiences. We all teach what we need to learn We all become the teacher of what we have learned and that is also the beauty of the soul journey.

     Through these subtle nuances of choice I am truly creating patterns of change. When you slowly change the hard core patterns of your life, you bring more energy and manifestation to everything you touch. When you can be strong enough to be vulnerable, authentic, and bold watch out because your life is about to go into hyper-speed but in a beautifully universal way. All you have to do is BELIEVE Beyond the Illusion !!!

Warmest regards,  Simran Singh

Excerpted from 11:11 Magazine May/June ’09 – Subscriptions available at